One of my favorite movies of all times is the movie “Heathers.” A movie dedicated to revealing the absurdity of being a mean girl:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRnluLJXtVk&sns=em

For the most part the days of being an insecure adolescent faking our way through high school are far behind us – with one glaring exception. When it comes to being a mom there exist two supposed separate and distinct camps: those who stay at home and those who work.  Now I don’t know whose idea it was to drag our high school drama into adulthood but here we are in our thirties and forties eyeing the moms from the other camp warily.

I admit I’m guilty of going over board to try to prove to the brotherhood of the motherhood (because I know they are tracking and grading me in their secret stay at home mom secret society meeting) that I’m as crafty and involved as they are.  In fact, this juvenile behavior led me to inadvertantly feed my son’s entire preschool class a German beer cake (long story for another day).  You know you have a problem when you start to share behavioral patterns with Michael Jackson.

I’ve often wondered how this whole lame war started.   Was it a couple of moms longing for the glory days who created an adult version of the mean eighth grade girl wars?  Was it a group of evil men who thought the rise of women needed to be thwarted and what better way than to divide and conquer?  Could it have been the children?  Did our innocent babies conspire to perpetuate the myth in order to play us off against each other like a couple of divorced parents constantly trying to outdo each other?

Whatever the cause, the battle needs to end now.  It’s counterproductive, a waste of time, and super, super silly.  As moms we need all the help we can get. Stay at home moms can be especially helpful to those of us who work. They know all the best teachers to request, all the best parks to play in, which educational websites our kids will actually like, and as an added bonus have all the best gossip.  And this, ladies, is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg.  They can help us in ways we aren’t even aware of.

So let’s give props to our sisters who stay home and benefit from their wealth of knowledge!   I’m calling for an official truce.  Let’s stop wasting our time and energy on the ridiculous and absurd and refocus it on things that actually make a positive difference in our lives – like drinking wine!

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